Silence may not be so golden

Most everyone has heard the expression, "silence is golden", and recognize that it is used in circumstances where it is thought that saying nothing is preferable to speaking. Equally, the expression, "put your foot in your mouth" implies that being silent presumably would've been a better alternative to what was stated. We have all found ourselves in these situations, and the feelings that follow are, at the very least, unpleasant and at times, regrettable.

During one of our family summer vacations, I had a disagreement with one of my sisters, and I recall telling her that I was not going to speak to her for the rest of my life. As you might suspect, most siblings develop differences of opinion and perhaps opt not to communicate as a means of retaliation, and it sure beats the alternative. Parents then find themselves on the front end of a mediation process reconciling the two parties. Fortunately, we were at an age when we eventually worked things out ourselves. To this day, I am not sure what triggered the conflict, but the retaliatory behavior was far too punitive.

Now that I am considerably older, and hopefully wiser, I cannot imagine how different my relationship would have been with my sister had I never spoken to her again. I would not have: told her what a wonderful job she did in her senior play, congratulated her after graduating from Regis, stood up for her oldest son as a godparent, enjoyed and talked about the trips to Black River, Loma Linda, Grand Canyon, the BBMs, Rangeley, Estes Street, and blessed to have shared our work together at the office...the list could go on, as the list is endless. I cannot imagine just how empty that would have been, and thankfully, I never will.

As my sister celebrates her birthday, I just want to "say" with all my heart, I love you, and I am sure glad that I did not keep that promise many years ago. My life would simply not be the same, and for me, that would have been a tragic misfortune and truly regrettable. Silence, in this case, would not have been golden, but there is no doubt that you are. Happy Birthday sister, and I pray that we continue adding to the list...for many more years to come!